I woke up this morning, checked Instagram, and in the corner of my screen was guilt, grinning. I scrolled for 30 minutes and lost all of the creativity I woke up with.
While scrolling I saw about 300 things telling me I am not living my life to the fullest. I need to get 15 minutes of sunlight as soon as I wake up (missed that opportunity already). I am not walking enough, reading enough, volunteering enough, not making enough money (and btw I could be making $10k a month with this easy passive income gig everyone should be doing). Guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt.
This was all fun, at first. What started as music in our pockets quickly became texting without buttons that cramp our fingers. And then facetime. And then Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Temple Run, and email. All in one place.
When technology started rapidly advancing, we still had a finger on the pulse of our lives. We could remember years, if not months prior, when all of it didn’t exist. We still had options outside of our little phones.
Until it became the foundation for EVERYTHING. We were shoved into the screens. Boxed in and suffocating. Not overnight but it felt like it was overnight.
Movie tickets? On your phone. Your friend just got back from vacation? See the pics and recap on Instagram. Your kids are starting school? Enroll them online. And also, they need an iPad. Need new bedsheets? Order on Amazon.
We were never given the chance to find balance.
Now you can get blasted with world news in .3 seconds, and then 15 other things that make you feel like it’s your job, or your fault, or you’re doomed.
But I am not here to offer you more fuel for you ever burning anxiety fire.
The common theme online, when talking about online, is people want us to think that it’s IMPOSSIBLE to fix this. Or, it’s impossible without going fully tech detox (now THAT’S impossible) or without buying a $700 dumb phone (that’s just another product profiting on the same thing). Or a subscription to an app blocker, or an $80 Brick.
But, what I know to be true, is that you are not incapable of figuring all of this out. And you don’t have to buy a single thing.
We got here, blindly navigating a desert of crumbling tech, because of how rapidly we advanced in a short amount of time. We were never given the opportunity to figure out how to co exist with technology. And we have repeatedly been stripped of ways or opportunities to build a life outside of it. It’s not your fault.
I am sure you are familiar with the guilt I mentioned above. To me, it feels like an old friend. And enemy. It’s probably our mutual frenemy.
But you know what guilt makes us do? It makes us buy things.
So, let me tell you again, this is not your fault.
And the solution, of course, is turning back to life. But this is where I hesitate. I want to offer absolutely 0 ideas for what a good life looks like. I don’t want to list a bunch of whimsical things that sound beautiful. Because a good life cannot be prescribed. My good life might be your nightmare.
The cold turkey no phone, journaling at 6am, painting in the grass, walking to farmers markets lifestyle is a trend. It’s a perfect little square of life that makes you feel like you need to change a lot of things all at once to succeed. I will not give you that.
Instead, I want to say this: in tiny micromoves you can inch back to who you were before all of this. You, and only you, can give yourself the time and space to build the skillset of co existing with technology, because the powers that be intentionally didn’t.
And when you inevitably run into things that make you feel defeated or incapable, remember that that is on purpose.
The power is in your hands, that’s why you’re being sold to all the time.